Become Aware of Regulation 

Each person has a window of tolerance, the zone where they can regulate emotions and handle challenges effectively. Within the window of tolerance, individuals may experience emotions such as anger, sadness, and frustration, but are able to manage these feelings while remaining present and engaged. Think of the normal life inconveniences or struggles – maybe running late, forgetting to switch over the laundry, work deadlines, family disagreements, etc. When individuals are within their window of tolerance, they may experience frustration but can remain flexible and avoid being overwhelmed by emotions.  

Stress, trauma, health issues or emotional strain can push us outside of our window of tolerance and can look different for everyone. Some people respond in a hyper-aroused state (think of fight or flight) in which we may feel anxious, angry, on edge, or panicky. This is when your body is in high alert and ready to protect us from perceived danger. Others respond in a hypo-aroused state (think of freeze or shutdown) where we may feel disconnected, numb, exhausted – just shut down emotionally or physically. This may be zoning out, feeling detached, or lacking motivation. When we spend a lot of time outside our window of tolerance we may start seeing the burnout, depression, anxiety, relationship issues, etc. 

Therapy and other healing modalities can create a safe and supportive space to understand your window of tolerance as well as develop tools for managing emotions and stress, healing from trauma, and processing deeper parts of yourself. Mindfulness, somatic awareness, grounding and can all be tools to help recognize your responses when outside of your window of tolerance and to help you return to a more optimal zone. By applying these tools, your window of tolerance expands, allowing situations to become more manageable and creating greater confidence in addressing them.